The commitment you Must make to create lasting change.
This time of year we hear all about New Year’s resolutions and how to keep them. I‘ve created resolutions and then fallen off track within the first few weeks of January. However, in making the film Sacred Journey of the Heart, I believe I’ve discovered the KEY to lasting change. And it’s not just about the heart!
So what is the key? It’s the awareness of the thought and feeling patterns that keep you stuck and disempowered. Of my list of 10 patterns below, the most important one to be aware of in relation to change, is what I call “The Motivation Zapper”. If you are truly interested in lasting transformation, I contend that no old habit can be changed and no new one implemented without ferreting out the vestiges of these learned “victim-thought-feeling” patterns. I suggest that you make ONE commitment for 2014 – to notice these patterns and to kick them to the curb! The rest of your “resolutions” will follow easily from here!
The key commitment to change
Resistance to change is very simply a vestige of learned victim habit patterns. Most of us think we don’t have these anymore but if you’ve ever found yourself wondering “how did I end up here again?”, then it’s likely that lurking in the shadows is a remnant or two of your old familiar victim self. “But I’m not a victim anymore!” I’ve said this and I’ve heard others say it, but then… look at your results. If you are not where you want to be, how about making a choice to commit to a new way of anchoring in New Year’s resolutions?
The most important commitment you can make is to be aware of the 10 patterns below and to shift them as soon as you notice them:
Change-Blocking Thought & Feeling patterns
- The motivation zapper: “I can’t because” – Powerlessness
- The procrastination syndrome: “I’ll do it later” – Resistance
- The paralyzing excuse ploy: “If only x than y” – Helplessness
- The self-styled straight-jacket: “I can’t decide” – Doubt & Indecision
- The stupefying safety zone: “I can’t figure it out” – Confusion
- The chronic apology: “I’m sorry, it’s all my fault” – Guilt
- The reverse road-block: “If only I had…” – Regret
- The anti-enthusiasm energy drain: “What if….” Worry
- The blame game: “It’s all your fault” – Resentment
- The emotional bypass: “It’s all good” or “I don’t have that problem” – Denial
The origin of the pattern
At the root of every “bad habit” or something we want to change about ourselves is a remnant of a learned behavior based on a specific thinking-feeling pattern. As a mother of 4 children, I know that we come into this world believing in limitless possibilities. Little kids believe they can do anything- fly, win every game they play, and be anything they want to be. The #1 cause of “victim-think” process is not yet instilled in them.
Over time, kids learn that they can’t do x,y,or z because of something outside of their control. Most of this is rational but a good portion is the limited paradigm that we are all subject to as we grow up. Very few of us learn the paradigm-altering reality of quantum field energetics. You know, the “observer’s expectations alter the behavior of the object”? So we learn to become limited, safe and less-than-the powerful beings we truly are.
The most common roadblock to change
Of my list of 10 patterns below, the most important one to be aware of in relation to change, is what I call “The Motivation Zapper”. This is any statement that begins with, “I can’t because….”. Language is very powerful and plays a major part in shaping our reality. When you say or think this #1 disempowering phrase, you are actually saying “I can’t Be the Cause in my own life for change.”
Whenever we feel disempowered it can bring us back to a state from our childhood when we didn’t have the ability to make choices about what we wanted to do and when we could do it. We often didn’t have choices about simple things that today we take for granted, such as when to go to bed and when to wake up, what to eat, what to wear and who we had to hug and kiss. Does anyone remember being told as a child “Go kiss your Aunt?” And the aunt had bad breath or slobbery kisses? Even when we’ve been on the path of consciousness for a long time, the chemical memories of powerlessness can sneak up on us and take us right back to this state without even noticing it.
If you commit to noticing how you use the phrase “I can’t because…” , you may discover that this Motivation Zapper is impacting small decisions as well as big ones. Noticing is the first step to change. From here, you can take the next two steps to make change permanent.
The 3 steps to shift old patterns:
1) Notice – becoming aware
2) Choose – taking action
3) Shift – anchoring the new pattern
S-H-I-F-T is my own proprietary process I teach in private sessions and workshops and it stands for “Spirit-Heart-Intelligence Foundational Technique”. It’s a simple integrative spirit-emotion-thought based process that gets at the root of resistance and anchors in permanent change.
On Wednesday, January 15 at 5 pm central standard time, I will be offering a 90 minute tele-class on how to shift each one of these 10 patterns. If you want to shift anything, you first have to know where you are on the MAP and where you want to go. The M-A-P is part of shift process I’ll be sharing on the call. The investment in this 90 minute class is only $14.99. Stay tuned on January 6th for information about how to register for this class or email me now for early bird registration at only $9.99! Yes! send me info on Early bird registration
As a preview, here’s what we shift to on our internal MAP:
OLD PATTERN NEW PATTERN
- Powerlessness Empowered
- Resistance Willingness
- Helplessness Resourceful
- Doubt Certainty
- Confusion Assuredness
- Guilt Appropriate Responsibility
- Regret Contentment
- Worry Peace
- Resentment Acceptance
- Denial Acknowledgement
I will be discussing these patterns throughout 2014 on my blog so you can stay tuned over time or join me for the SHIFT process on January 15. If you can’t make the call “live” you can listen to the recording at your convenience. When you sign up, you will receive the dial-in number and PIN.
I look forward to an empowering and life-changing 2014!
Happy New Year!