Conscious Growth Creation
In the sizzling peak of our hot desert summer in Phoenix, Arizona, my kids have gotten me hooked into watching cooking shows for the first time ever: our favorites are Chopped! and Cupcake Wars. Getting engrossed in these shows, I can’t help but wonder- when did cooking become a competitive sport and so very, very stressful?
Also — when did TV watching become connected to “bingeing”? I thought bingeing was just about food and now there are all these shows about cooking under extreme stress, that you can binge-watch, while I guess, also binge eat! Or at least get some good food cravings going from all the great food being prepared!
When I realized that “desserts” is “stressed” spelled backwards, it’s no wonder that when we are stressed- we sometimes go for extra desserts!
It’s easier now than ever before to give in to cravings- and end up bingeing and feeling out of control. There have never been so many different ways we can distract ourselves and/or reward ourselves for dealing with the stress in our daily lives. I may be behind the curve with this trend because I didn’t ever know it existed, until I found myself binge-watching cooking shows. This lasted a few days until my kids and I were watching one episode that was very high stress and ended up with a cooking fire in the kitchen!
This led me to smack my forehead and say “get a grip Ronna! Turn off the TV and walk away from the cooking shows!” I had slipped into an adrenaline craving – i.e. watching TV shows that are based on high-stress and thereby getting stressed myself, and that led to binge TV watching! Thank goodness, it only took me a few days to get out of the grips of the adrenaline carving, binge indulging cycle! Because guess what? The more I sat on the couch, the more I mindlessly snacked! Oops!
Happily, I have a lot of resources to access when I find myself going in a direction that isn’t productive. I was able to use the techniques from Brain Tek’s program and also, to re-activate my heart’s coherence and make better choices about my time and energy.
If you find yourself struggling with stress-related cravings or bingeing, either one of these programs can help and neither one of them involves dieting or restricting food:
Brain Tek’s Behavioral Relationship Entrainment (BRE) program is a 4 to 6 week program where individualized sound protocols are used to re-wire your neural pathways so that you can get back in control of your decisions. The key thing that happens is that under prolonged stress, your frontal cortex- your brain’s executive command center, is hijacked by your limbic system or the emotional brain. It’s nearly impossible to make consistent and good decisions when you’re experiencing this brain hijack process.
During the BRE program, you also learn a quick and effective technique to activate your frontal cortex and get back on track, anytime, anywhere. This is exactly what I did when I had the moment of awareness that I had been binge-watching cooking shows. During the BRE program, you learn to give yourself a very simple cue. In my case, I touch my forehead (or smack it if needed!) –and that gets my decision-maker back on track!
Combined with sound therapies that re-wire the brain for optimal functioning, it’s very easy to keep up your progress. Brain Tek also has a great standard stress sound protocol that you can purchase for $9.99 and own forever! It’s called “Stress Relief” and it specifically targets the stress centers of your brain so you can calm down and relax.
http://www.sgserver.net/braintek/?idev_id=117
With the 4 week Stop Emotional Eating Program, you learn 3 quick and easy self-regulation techniques that use the innate power in your heart to make better choices. It’s a different approach but just as effective if you keep up the techniques.
These HeartMath techniques are Notice and Ease, the Power of Neutral and Quick Coherence. The first two, Notice and Ease and the Power of Neutral, are helpful to stop cravings as soon as you become aware of them. Quick Coherence is the main technique we use to change the pattern of stress eating and to sustain commitments you make to having a healthier lifestyle.
Both programs are very robust and include individual coaching with me. They are tailored to your needs and your specific goals. And as I stated above, neither one of them focuses on dieting, restrictions or calorie counting!
The good news is that when you are stressed, you don’t have to find yourself reaching for more desserts or treats. You can activate either the brain or the heart’s power to learn new skills for managing life’s every day stressors before they get overwhelming or out of control.
It truly is one of life’s greatest pleasures to enjoy a great dessert every once in a while! For me, the more conscious I am of making a good choice, the better the dessert tastes!
For information about either the BRE or Stop Emotional Eating Programs, please email me at ronna@modernmastery.com
I get a lot of emails about classes and programs about “finding your purpose” – most of them with a lot of marketing hype around them which include things like “last chance to sign up”, “buy now before the price increases tomorrow”, “2 or 3 easy steps to transform your life in 1 day”!
Only 2 steps????????
Wow! I don’t respond to those very well. Do you?
I did however, get sucked into a “revival tent” type experience at a Free conference in Los Angeles a few years ago. After all the promises were laid out about how my life would change, I found myself hypnotically going to the back of the room, where we were all being whipped up to go, to sign up for a super-expensive mentoring program based on the idea of becoming rich – very, very rich.
But I had a little gut feeling that said “this is crazy”. I have to say, I didn’t listen to that voice and I signed up. I learned a lot and don’t regret the experience (just the temporary impact on my bank account!) But what I learned was not what was being taught.
Here are a few things that I have learned:
- I learned that desiring to become very, very rich for the sake of it does not work very well. (You can dress up this desire by saying “If I get rich, I will help a lot other people” –pretending that your true desires are philanthropic –but if you are not sharing now, chances are you won’t later either)
- I learned that if you begin from the premise that where you are right now is “wrong”, it’s difficult, if not impossible, to change to what is “right”
- I learned that working with the Law of Attraction is limiting and often attracts the opposite of what you say you want.
- I learned that the current craze in creating “multiple streams of income”, is based on some marketing principles that do not contain true heart energy. They are based on getting more, having more and selling more.
I took what I learned in the program and began to explore what I now know to be the Higher Laws of Manifestation. I have been using these for a few years now and I am pleased with what’s happened in my life: greater abundance, greater joy and more sharing from my heart.
I am sharing these Higher Laws in a free webinar on Thursday, June 18th at 5 pm Pacific time. To join me, please email me for the password at ronna@modernmastery.com
The reason I have a password is not to keep the information secret! It is so I know who is interested in this topic and we can share information, stories and tools.
Here are a few things that I have learned on my own in working with the Higher Laws
- When you are passionate about sharing what you have to offer, it aligns with your true Purpose
- When you are aligned with your true Purpose, you are Empowered
- When you are Empowered, you are a creating a positive impact in the environment around you – including your relationships, your work and your ability to have fun!
- When you create a positive impact, abundance naturally flows to you, from a source within, creating a result without!
If this calls to you, please join me this Thursday!
Title: Manifesting with the Higher Universal Laws
Date & Time: Thursday, June 18th at 5:00pm Pacific
Attend by Phone:
Guest pin code: 339751#
Primary dial in number: (425) 440-5100
Secondary dial in number: (619) 471-1669
Full list of dial in Numbers:
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/Local/?eventid=70738887
Event Page:
http://iTeleseminar.com/70738887
Email for password: ronna@modernmastery.com
Beyond the Law of Attraction – Manifesting with the Highest Universal Laws
Update: September 2015: Learn more about exactly how to work with all 12 Universal Laws in my 4 part webinar. The live classes take place on September 19 & 26, and October 3 & 17 all at 9 am pacific daylight time. If you missed the dates, the classes are replaying and you may listen/watch at your convenience. For more information: 12 Laws WebinarIn my recent article about how to stop mind chatter, I made a statement: “my life stands in opposition to the Law of Attraction”. I received quite a few questions on this and so now, I’ll explain it. In doing so, I will share with you what I have learned in working with what I call “The Higher Operative Laws of Manifestation”. I’ll keep it to the basics because to fully understand the higher laws, you have to have a working knowledge of the 12 Universal Laws of Consciousness.
What are some examples to prove my point about the law of attraction NOT being the key law at work in my life?
I’ve been upfront with you about my struggle with pessimism because I’ve worked really hard to overcome it, so what follows will probably not surprise you!
I’m happy to say that after I retrained my brain with Brain Tek (See my previous articles), I am no longer suffering from this state of mind!
I’ll present this with the Thought/Feeling context and the Outcome Result:
While producing my feature documentary film, Sacred Journey of the Heart, I was plagued with the following Thoughts/Feelings
Thoughts: “I’ll never get the film done, it won’t be very good, I won’t get final approval from my film speakers, it will never amount to anything.”
Feelings: Inferior, insecure, rejected, worthless
Result/Outcome: My first-ever documentary film was completed in a more compelling and beautiful way than I ever imagined. We have won multiple awards for Best Editing, Best Director, Best Story and Most Inspirational Filmmaker. And all of my guest speakers in the film signed off on their interviews and the final film edit. Just before doing a one-time screening at Studio Movie Grill, Dan Harkins of Harkin’s Theaters, the fifth largest theater chain in the country, asked to see it for acquisition in his theaters.
Best Director Award
According to the Law of Attraction, this result/outcome wasn’t supposed to happen.
While Dan Harkins’ team was evaluating the film, I did something unique: I entered into a state (feeling and thinking) of curiosity and wonderment. I had no expectation as this offer was completely unexpected and I had nothing “riding” on it. I just wondered what could happen. I was curious if Harkins would like the movie and if more people would end up seeing it at Harkins than one showing at a local competing chain.
When Harkins called and said, “we’ve accepted your film for a one week run”, I was pleasantly surprised but nervous. How was I going to pull this off and figure out how to get ready for a theatrical release in a few weeks?
Here’s one more example:
About three weeks before the film premier, I went to Harkin’s Camelview Theater where the film would be screened and met with the manager. He showed me the ropes and helped me understand what I needed to be ready to screen, things I had never thought of, like a movie poster, a 1-sheet description of the film, ads in the Phoenix Republic newspaper, TV and radio interviews etc. Then he showed me the theater we were booked into. It had 75 seats. I thought, “Wow, I hope 75 people will come.” Then he explained that if advance ticket sales went well before the premier date, he would bump me up into the larger theaters. He then showed me the 450 seat theater. Here’s what happened:
Thoughts: “We’ll never sell this many tickets, I only know about 50 people in Phoenix and they’re probably busy, I’ll probably fail. My guest speakers in the film will probably be too busy to come”
Feelings: Insecurity, embarrassed, vulnerable, hesitant.
Outcome/Result: Our premier was sold out in the largest theater two weeks before the premier date. There was standing room only and people were trying to scalp tickets outside. My film was held over for a total run of 4 weeks as viewers spread the word and came back multiple times (as many as 5 or 6). Most of my guest speakers in the film flew into town for the premier: Gregg Braden, Dr .Deborah Rozman from HeartMath, Uqualla, Larry Running Turtle Salazar and many more!
Harkins Premier Audience
Again, according the Law of Attraction, this was not supposed to happen.
If the Law of Attraction was the operative law, I would have experienced a mediocre outcome or no outcome at all. My thoughts were largely pessimistic, my feelings were difficult to deal with and some of the people close to me were getting a bit fed up by my negativity in the face of impending success.
Here’s what was really happening, after all is said and done, and I’ve done a post-mortem on the events that led up to so many positive and life-changing experiences:
I was subconsciously working with the highest 4 laws of manifestation: I’ll share two of these with you here: The Law of Reciprocity and the Law of Confluence. I have grouped the 12 laws into 3 groups of 4 laws each. I will review the 12 laws in my webinar (see details below).
I work with this process with clients and see tremendous changes in their lives when they consciously start to interact with the highest laws. By the way, the Law of Attraction is in the second grouping, along with the Law of Polarity and the Law of Correspondence. It works primarily with the thinking faculties which is why it works so well for manifesting a parking space. But most of us are interested in things more satisfying than a good spot at the mall.
The Law of Confluence is actually featured in my film. At the end of a very emotional scene in the film, a black screen appears with these words:
So you get a sense of what the Law of Confluence is all about. I further describe it in the movie as the energy that brings many things together in a stream of connection, sort of like the Nile Delta. This is what I experienced in the film over and over again, in spite of my pessimism – a higher law was at work.
The most active law I was working with was the Law of Reciprocity. My deepest desire was to share my work with a larger audience and to share the work of many others who have had a significant impact on the lives of others with their cutting edge teachings. I also wanted to honor the wisdom of our ancestors and highlight their teachings in honorable and beautiful ways. I wanted to share, give back, and help others.
And in this way, others came in droves to help me. Such as Liz Dawn of Mishka Productions who sent out an email to her fans announcing the film premier. The next day, we were sold out! And Mary Morrissey who contacted me, through her dear friend Marianne Wilson, to let me know she would be thrilled to narrate my film! Mary’s call answered a vision in my heart that the film would be narrated by a powerful and heart-centered woman. And Dr. Joe Dispenza who agreed to interview with us after a long travel day and teaching a workshop.
All of these miraculous things were happening because I was working with the Law of Reciprocity and the Law of Confluence. These laws are far more powerful and can override the Laws of Attraction, Correspondence and Polarity. So that’s what I mean by the statement: “My life stands in opposition to the law of attraction”.
I have been working the highest four laws for a few years now. Many, many miraculous things have happened and I won’t bore you with all of them!
If you are intrigued by how this works, I will be sharing more detail in my upcoming webinar. This is the intro webinar that is still available for free viewing:
Title: Introduction to Working with the Highest Universal Laws of Manifestation
Replay Page:
http://iTeleseminar.com/70738887
Please email me for the password to this event. ronna@sacredjourneyoftheheart.com
The full 4 part webinar class is available for purchase for only $19.99
We are not taught how to let go! No one teaches us this but everyone seems to say it from time to time: “Just let it go!” Usually our only instruction about letting go happens when we are a toddler and not sharing a toy, hanging on to it for dear life. As a consequence, the toy gets taken away and we hear about how nice children “share”. So it’s no wonder we struggle with how to actually willingly let go of something. 
In today’s article, I will share with you the 2 specific things that prevent us from permanently letting go.
At some point in life, most of us find ourselves searching for resources, tools and techniques for letting go of the past or shifting a repeating pattern. My search has led me to the best experts in the self-help industry and I have tried an “alphabet soup” of supposedly proven techniques. Here are a few that I have tried, many of which I delved very deeply into: The Sedona Method, The Release Technique, EFT –Emotional Freedom Technique or “tapping”, Psych-K, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), shamanic soul retrieval, and The Healing Codes. I have also heard first-hand accounts from my clients about their experiences with many of these techniques.
The good news is that most of them work, if we work consistently with the system. But the bad news is, they only work up to a point or we stop doing it.
The key to unlocking the doorway to permanent letting go (without the “Bounce-back effect”) is to discover where the stopping point is, and “let go of the stopping”.
I have discovered exactly where the stopping point is. And it is located right inside our physiology. It is NOT, in my experience, in the non-localized mind –i.e. conscious, subconscious or unconscious or in repressed emotions.
This is exactly why all the techniques listed above work only up to a point, and tend to stop working during a big stress-related event. Why?
SPECIFIC THING #1: Because we have a biological tendency to stick with the familiar, especially in times of stress. It is wired into our physiology to reset to old patterns when we encounter an intense or prolonged challenge.
SPECIFIC THING #2: Releasing techniques rely upon only certain parts of our energy anatomy and many are dependent upon a practitioner to do something for us, to us or with us.
For example, the Sedona Method focuses on cognitive and emotional processing. Psych-K focuses on spiritual and cognitive processing with a practitioner facilitating the sessions. EFT focuses on physical, emotional and cognitive processing and can be self or practitioner led. ALL of them require a lot of time, a lot of repetition and a lot of discipline.
What happens along the way when we encounter a stressful event? Discipline is often the first thing to go out the window and then the old habit, thoughts, and feelings creep back in and we find ourselves with the weight back on, or overextended on a credit card or in a similar relationship conflict.
So what to do? I will be sharing the 2 foolproof ways that resolve the issues related to SPECIFIC THING #1 and #2. (Anybody read Dr. Suess’ Cat in the Hat? We will have fun with Thing 1 and Thing 2 in the workshop!)
When you “get” the Thing 1 and Thing 2 antidotes, it will enhance your progress with any other releasing technique and ensure that you don’t stop. And I will also share the Secret Ingredient to Letting Go: it is a specific state of being, both mental and emotional. It’s a state that is easy to cultivate and fun to be in- and it’s not acceptance or gratitude. It requires no meditation, specific breathing or any other outside tool.
The details for the May 30th online and in-person event are listed at the bottom of this article.
Before I close, I want to examine the surefire ways we know we are stuck in old patterns.
These are three signs that indicate that we are NOT yet letting go: 1) Asking “Why is this happening?” , 2) trying to act or pretend that “It’s all good”, and 3) feeling incredulous about what is happening. What does incredulous mean? “Disinclined or indisposed to believe, indicating or showing shock, surprise or disbelief.”
Will Ferrell acting incredulous
There is actually only one mental/emotional state where the true act of letting go happens, and again, it’s not acceptance and it’s not gratitude!
I know this because the events that occurred for me personally in 2014 led me to dive deeply into the letting go process. In the beginning of 2014, I found myself embroiled in a situation that left me feeling incredulous and asking “Why?” Mid-way through the year, I found the “missing link” to letting go and since then, I have created a very effective multi-dimensional practice to keep the process moving.
So why do issues and challenges have a tendency to bounce back? The answer is very simple – so simple we often complicate the process.
In the first half of 2014, I had been doing what a lot of my clients were reflecting back to me when they would come to my office, throw themselves into the chair opposite me and say “This (relationship conflict, being alone, not getting the job they want etc.. ) HAS TO STOP!, I’m done with it! I’ve let go of “IT”. And then the next month, the same thing would happen. It is immensely frustrating when the “IT”, keeps dragging on, like my situation did with court dates, depositions, and attorney meetings – none of that could just stop.
So what’s the simple answer? It’s found in the analogy of a rubber ball. When we throw a rubber ball at a wall, it just bounces back! It comes back with a lot of force, sometimes it even hits us. That’s what most of us do when we want to let something go. We throw it away with emphasis, force and an exclamation point! This HAS to stop! Some of us are so good at it that we have a strap on our wrist attached to the rubber ball and we don’t even know it!
But, if we learn to let the ball roll softly out of our hand, it just rolls away. It doesn’t come back.
In my workshop/webinar, I will be sharing exactly how to let IT roll away. It involves a very simple process and does not entail a ton of repetition, self monitoring or rating yourself or your feelings on a scale of 1 to 10 or on any scale for that matter!
Please click here for information about the workshop/ webinar. Click here to register. I invite you to have fun with me as we learn new and effective ways to Let Go!
If someone offered you the key to unlock the door to complete mastery of your mind and emotions would you take it or leave it?
That’s the question to keep “in mind” while you read this article that will demonstrate how EASY it is to stop negative mind chatter (just 2 steps) and why this is the Key to ending our dance with unconscious patterns that keep us locked in an inner prison of unfulfilled hopes and dreams as well as the accumulated effects of daily stress.
What is the result of stopping negative mind chatter or ANTS? (ANT means Automatic Negative Thinking, the acronym coined by Dr. Daniel Amen, a leading researcher on brain and behavior.)
The result of eradicating mind chatter ANTS:
A calm, centered mind, restful sleep, increased productivity, easier decision making, and an easy-going attitude towards life’s ups and downs. If this is something you want, I’ve discovered the key that unlocks the inner-prison door. And to boot, a much easier time meditating.
Because we are going to be talking about ANTs, I just have insert this movie poster from the 1954 sci-fi flick, “THEM”. If you’ve never seen this movie, it’s worth checking out. It’s considered one of the best sci fi films of the 1950s. It’s even more entertaining if you watch it and make the connection between THEM –the ants, and the negative mind chatter going on in the collective psyche, post WWII and in the beginning of the nuclear era! Being a fan of acronyms, I like to call THEM (the ANTs) “Thoughts Hijacking Emotional Mastery”!
I’ll explain later why ending mind chatter is so key to unlocking all other undesirable conditions. And by the way, this one “condition” is the common denominator on the list my clients share with me as we start the easy process of ending old habits.
But first let’s look at the before and after picture of ANTS.
I’ll use an example of hosting a picnic to show the difference:
The ANT party:
BEFORE: Start planning a picnic and up creeps an Automatic Negative Thought – “Something might go wrong” or “I probably won’t do it right” –> worry —>anxiety –> procrastination —>stress –> feeling sick and/or tired —> sending out this “sick and tired” vibe to everyone around us —->people tend to avoid us in this state —> isolation —> depression —> the ants carry off the chips or there’s no picnic at all!
AFTER: Start planning a picnic and up creeps an ANT —“What if I mess up somehow?” —> oops! There’s an ANT —> Shift the thought out of the deep limbic brain structure from whence it came! Into the Frontal Cortex of the brain —-> Go back to planning a great picnic —> Enjoy an amazing picnic with friends!
(And by the way, I have nothing against ant insects. They are an important part of our ecosystem and play key roles of ecosystem engineers.)
So as you can tell from this quick example, the KEY is healing the very cause of the ANT right at its source – the deep limbic structure of the brain!
Dr. Amen says this: “When the deep limbic system (the emotional center of the brain) is overactive, it sets the mind’s filter on “negative”. His theory is this: “My patients have to heal their deep limbic systems to change their negative thinking patterns.”
I’ve looked at 6 suggestions and techniques that claim to be the solution to ending negative mind chatter. I’ll share these quickly, including Dr. Amen’s “kill the ant” technique and then suggest a process that is 1) way easier than any of them and 2) is quick and effective. According to Dr. Amen, if you have enough red ants at the picnic, you can’t enjoy the beautiful day, the delicious food that you’ve prepared or even the lovely people you are with!
(If you want to skip to the 2 step process that is easy and works, just scroll past my summary of the 6 current thought methods of eliminating ANTs.)
6 Current ideas about how to end mind chatter:
1) Gut it out and do it anyway! This one is actually my old practice of getting things done despite my negative mind chatter. I grew up in a very negative personal reality of childhood abuse which created a pessimistic world view. I had no training on how to be positive. Even though I had chronically negative thoughts, I found a way to get things done successfully by just gutting it out and doing it.
In many ways, my life stands in direct opposition to the Law of Attraction (a topic for a later article.) I even went so far as to be mentored by the leading “positive thinking gurus” on the planet. And I still couldn’t force my way into positive thinking. Challenge with this approach: it creates a huge amount of stress and a perception of failure if you can’t force your way into being positive!
2) Consciously clearing (suggested by Marcia Reynolds, PsyD)– “you have to empty your brain to control your mind”. The idea is that you start by practicing clearing your mind for one minute and building up until you can do it at will. This is a cornerstone to meditation. However, if you have an overactive mind, it is likely that you have tried meditation and given up at some point for the very reason that you can’t stop your mind and meditation gets annoying!
Challenge with this approach: it either doesn’t work (try it for one minute and see how you do!) or it takes a lot of time and patience.
3) Concentration exercises (suggested by Remez Sasson, author of “How to Focus Your Mind”) – “Shutting down the mental noise voluntarily develops gradually, and over a long period of time through concentration exercises and meditation.” Challenge with this approach: it takes a long time and people generally do not devote the time to do it.
4) Make peace with mind chatter (suggested by Steve Andreas) – “If you have ever tried to stop a critical voice, you know that it is extremely difficult—if not impossible—to do.” He suggests that rather, we make peace with it (accept mind chatter) and then try to educate it so that it speaks to us in ways that are more helpful and useful, becoming a friendly and supportive ally instead of a cruel tormentor. Challenge: you can’t think your way into educating the deep limbic system where these thoughts arise.
5) Stop negative mind chatter by no longer pursuing the goals that create it (suggested by Raj Raghunathan, Ph.D) This is an interesting one. Dr. Raghunathan participated in a research project that identified 3 categories of negative mind chatter: a) thoughts related to inferiority, b) thoughts related to love and approval and c) thoughts related to control-seeking. He explains, “Each of these categories of mental chatter is, I believe, rooted in goals and values to which most of us blindly subscribe. As such, it’s not surprising that our thoughts revolve around inferiority, love, and control. For example, most of are brought up to succeed and excel in life; as a result, we are habituated to comparing ourselves—in terms of our skills, talents and endowments—with that of our peers, which generates inferiority-related thoughts.” He wonders what would happen if we simply stop pursing the goals of success, of being in love and of being in control. Challenge: most of us probably don’t want to do this or have no idea how to go about it and get anything accomplished!
6) KILL the ANT – Feed your anteater! (suggested by Dr. Daniel Amen). Dr. Amen’s “feed your anteater and feel better” exercise is an excellent tool. First you learn about the 9 types of ANT species, and then monitor your thoughts. As ANTs creep into your thoughts, you use his worksheet process to interact with the ANT species and talk to the ANT, thereby killing the ANT and feeling better. Challenge: Again, it takes a lot of work, constant self-monitoring and practice, practice, practice. But the process is so good, that I am sure I will continue to use it from time to time to clean up any random ANTs that creep up on me!
So if these don’t really work or take a lot of time and effort what does work? Sound therapy and a simple brain exercise!
Here are the two steps, created by Dr. Dennis Manness of Brain Tek Institute, that easily and effectively work to end mind chatter:
1) Create more effective brain-based neural pathways. Using cutting edge sound therapy developed by Brain Tek Institute, you first rewire your brain’s neural circuity that automatically (a la ANT) drives your thoughts into the deep brain structure called the cingulate gyrus. The cingulate gurus is part of the limbic system responsible for repeating thoughts and emotions over and over again. By rewiring your brain, you restore effective higher-thinking processes that occur without your having to “think about it.” The sound protocols do the work for you. All you need to do is relax and listen! This is the easy solution to what Dr. Amen suggests: healing your limbic system to eliminate negative mind chatter.
2) You easily shift your thoughts and emotions out of the limbic system and into the frontal cortex of the brain. During the 4 to 6 week program, you will learn how to use a simple technique to shift your thoughts into the frontal cortex of your brain, thereby immediately eliminating the cascade of emotions and behaviors that perpetuate negative mind chatter.
That’s it! It is easy, effective and it lasts. No time-consuming thought-policing, exercises or trying to wrestle your brain into positivity.
The final piece of information in this article is this:
Why ending negative mind chatter is this the key to establishing “emotional and mental mastery
Ending negative mind chatter is KEY because one ANT never lives alone! Ants live in ant hills, called colonies. If you eradicate one red ant, you still have thousands of underground red ants to deal with. And until recently, scientist believed that ant colonies were discreet units, consisting sometimes of as many as 306 million worker ants and one million queen ants! However, more recent research suggests that there is something called a “single-global mega-colony”. What does this analogy mean for our brains?
Until we deal with the mega-colony of red ANTs that reside in the brain’s limbic system, we will deal with the cascade of emotions and thoughts that develop over time as the ANT’s run around unchecked: negative mind chatter leads to all the other patterns I described in the “before” picnic scenario: worry, rumination, anxiety, loneliness, and depression.
When we eliminate negative mind chatter, we automatically feel better, more at peace, more capable of making good decisions and a whole host of other positive changes. And the good news, is we don’t have to think our way into it. It happens naturally as our limbic system relaxes and no longer hijacks the rest of our brain.
I have seen this at work with my Brain Tek clients who have gone through the 4 or 6 week program. Without exception, every person I have brought through Brain Tek’s Behavioral Relationship Entrainment program stated that they wanted to deal with their ‘mind chatter issue”.
Just for fun, I will elaborate on how the successful picnic unfolds after we heal the deep limbic system in the brain:
Thought: “I’m going to invite my friends to a picnic.” Because old neural pathways are still in the brain, even after sound therapy, the one little ANT may show up again: “I might not do it right”. But after sound therapy, what occurs, is we notice this thought right away and we naturally shift it OUT of the deep brain structure, namely, the cingulate gyrus, and easily drive our brain’s dominant function to the frontal cortex – the “executive decision maker” of our brains. So if and when we notice an ANT, we simply say to ourselves, “shift the dominance!” That’s it! The pattern stops right there!
And with great enjoyment, we invite our friends, plan the picnic, don’t worry about the weather and voila! Enjoy an ant-free, beautiful day with people we love spending time with. We feel great! We are satisfied and fulfilled with things that matter – people, rich and meaningful sharing and a deep sense of contentment.
That’s the picnic I’m planning! And I can do it now, and so can my clients who have experienced the life-changing and easy process of Behavioral Relationship Entrainment.
To learn more about the Brain Tek program, please email me at ronna@modernmastery.com
Drivers who don’t signal to turn or who speed up when you try to pass, cigarette butts on the ground, people who carve their initials in rocks in state parks, people who cut in line… This is a short list of my pet peeves. Instead of letting these little peeves sneak up and upset me, I decided to work with them and wow! I discovered that these pet peeves can create a BIG change in my inner landscape.
But first, why ever bother to do anything about a personal peeve?
What is a pet peeve? According to Wikipedia: A pet peeve is a minor annoyance that an individual identifies as particularly annoying to himself or herself, to a greater degree than others may find it. Also, it is defined as “a thing that provokes one the most”. (Etymonline.com) The origin of the word came about in 1919, from the 14th-century word peevish, meaning “ornery or ill-tempered”.
So really, anything that provokes us to be ornery or ill-tempered has the potential to reflect on our own inner emotional landscape.
Each time we get riled up, there is a cascade of physiological reactions: our blood pressure can go up, our heart rate accelerates, and we get a dose of cortisol, the stress hormone, racing through our entire system. And, we are usually angry, annoyed and provoked about “them” doing something to “us”. And if you’ve read my HeartMath blog articles, you know that the heart signal that emanates from within, sends BIG signals to all of those around us, that translate to “stay away from this person! they are mad!” http://sacredjourneyoftheheart.com/blog/?p=163
Take a minute to write down your top 5 pet peeves before reading on. This is a fun exercise!
Now that you have your list, ask yourself, “What does each peeve really mean about what I am doing? How does it reflect on my actions and reactions?”
For example, when I discover that there’s no more toilet paper on the roll, I am capable of yelling around the house: “Am I the ONLY one who can change a toilet paper roll in this house?!” Even if my kids are not home, I can stomp around and be angry. And depending on when you discover the absence of this crucial element in the bathroom, it can be worse than just an annoyance!
Having fun with this means translating each pet peeve to a more symbolic meaning: (and there are many with the empty toilet paper roll, but I will stick with the less visceral ones…) For example, what are the “clean-up” things in my day to day activities, am I leaving undone, or expecting someone else to do for me? Oh boy! this points right to something going on right now. My PR guru is setting up a new landing page for me and I have yet to get her the two paragraphs of content for it. Somehow, I’ve been hoping she could do this little “dirty work” for me – after all, she knows what I’m trying to do!!
Another interpretation is this: it’s time to get into the crevices and around the floor boards of my home for Spring cleaning. I’d rather have someone else do it for me, but I know it is an important task for me to do myself. Taking care of my beautiful home is an important act of gratitude. Why is it important and useful to do this little exercise?
1) it frees you from petty reactivity and unnecessary physiological stress
2) when you realize that you can actually change your physiological reaction to little stressors, it is much easier to apply the principles to bigger events.
3) You stop reacting like a victim to other people’s “bad actions” and you CHOOSE to shift your behavior and emotions to a more responsible place.
4) You have more fun interacting in the world from a place of levity and light-heartedness instead of anger, judgment and blame.
Before I go through a few more examples, I want to clarify that doing this exercise does not mean that we are condoning littering, bad driving, and selfish behavior. We all have the responsibility to take action when necessary and to be considerate and caring of others. But when I look at my pet peeves from this new perspective, I am able to clearly see the reflection of places I can personally do a better job in living day to day life.
To finish up, here are some potential meanings of the other peeves I’ve listed and questions to ask yourself:
Getting mad a drivers who do no use their turn signals: In what way I am neglecting to indicate my own direction in life- with my work and relationships. Am I giving clear intentions about where I am going? Or am I being clandestine, secretive or at times, just plain clueless?
Being upset by people who speed up when I am trying to pass them on the highway: Am I supporting the people around me and honoring the pace that works best for them? Or am I judging and internally criticizing people who are trying to move forward from a place of stagnation? Is it possible that I am being pushy?
Getting annoyed with people who carve their names in rock in state parks (or anywhere else!): Am I trying hard to leave an “impression” with others? Where am I focused on me, me, me – to the exclusion of others needs and desires? Am I secretly harboring a fear that my life doesn’t matter unless I do something of permanent lasting “value”?
Being upset by people who throw cigarette butts on the ground: Where am I leaving emotional debris? Am I being responsible for my interactions with others, or am I throwing ‘buts..’ around (i.e. getting defensive) when someone points something out to me about how I could do something better.
Getting upset when someone cuts in line: Am I trying to short cut or get ahead others? Am I being considerate and patient? I am cutting someone off while they are talking to me, or allowing myself to be distracted on the phone instead of paying attention?
When you uncover the true meaning of your pet peeves, you are then able to make a commitment to yourself to be more aware, more kind, more caring and basically, more heart-centered.
I’d love to hear your pet peeves and the inner meanings you discover!
Happy Discovery!
Ronna
PS – guess what just happened? (Sorry if I’m getting too personal here but this is too good not to share!) I just discovered an empty toilet paper roll in the bathroom. I had a wonderful, heart-centered laugh!! AND I’m off to write my 2 paragraphs.
Have you ever gotten to the end of the day and thrown yourself on the couch and wondered “What did I do today? How did the day go by so fast?” This is a hallmark statement of an over-busy life. I’ve had a few of those recently. And it was as if the universe had honed in on this issue for me when I received a slew of emails from people that started, “I know how super-busy you are but…. “
This gave me a pause. One that I was over-due in taking! Because I had gotten into a whirlwind of activity, some of it creative, some of it habit-driven multi-tasking and some of it related to an old avoidance pattern.
When I started looking into the issue, I came across this interesting chart:
This poll from yougov.com shows that 59% of people being polled consider themselves to be busy and over 1/3 of the people polled felt guilty or anxious if they were not busy! Uh-oh! When I got honest with myself, I had to admit that I can easily slip into the feeling of “not-enough” if I really slow down! So underneath a lot of busy-ness, can be feelings of unworthiness or the desire for perfectionism. That’s what I’m referring to when I mention an old avoidance pattern.
If we have some vestiges of unworthiness or perfectionism, they will tend to crop their heads up from time to time when we start slipping into busy-ness.
Obviously, keeping busy then becomes a defense pattern to avoid these feelings and being not-busy results in guilt and anxiety! And it’s true, guilt feels like a shadow on the heart- this is not a clear heart at all!
So rather than diving in to change my busy-pattern right away, I took my own advice from my last blog (“When not to change your life…. Now), and just observed myself for a few days. But the more I observed myself in my over-busy-ness, the more I slowed down naturally, remembering to breath more consciously, to pay attention to what I was doing, and to enjoy the little things in life.
I also realized my upbringing with a strong mid-western work ethic had caught up with me again. Don’t get me wrong, having a good work ethic is important but some of us got a big dose of guilt with the message. My grandparents were farmers and spent long days working in the fields. When we wanted to laze about on the weekends, we always got a lecture about some aspect of the value of work, sometimes peppered with words like “good-for-nothing” and “low-down lazy dogs” to describe people who didn’t work hard enough.
Guilt and Fear mixed all together: Snakes in the field:
The summer that I was 13 years old, my parents decided we needed to spend some time working on our grandparent’s farm in Wyoming in order to learn the value of work. So my 15 year old sister and I would get dropped off in the beet fields at 6 am to hoe weeds all morning. This was in the days before cell phones. The only problem was that the beet fields were filled with rattlesnakes because it was such a dry season that year. We finally got out of our weeding job after I nearly sat on a baby rattlesnake next to the irrigation ditch!
We spent the rest of the summer painting outbuildings. It seemed that whatever we did, someone else was always working longer and harder than us, so my sister and I would find ways to goof off while no one was looking! A few times we got caught up and received a dose of “lazy kid” guilt. I’m sure a lot of you have had similar experiences.
The key thing today, is this pattern of guilt for being not-busy will drive periodic times of over busy-ness. The first step then, is bringing it up to consciousness again~
Banish Guilt- Create from a Clear Heart!
This is the way “Creating from a Clear Heart” program works. The first step is being conscious and the rest of the steps flow from here.
The steps of the Clear Heart process are:
C- Conscious – Choosing to bring consciousness to a situation or emotion
L- Light Heartedness – Learning to cultivate and activate a sense of light-heartedness
E- Empowerment – Emancipating old patterns and habits by taking empowered action
A – Appreciation – Acknowledging your appreciation for what is occurring
R- Responsible – Restoring appropriate balance between heart/brain resulting in responsible thoughts, feelings and actions
In the recorded broadcast of the Clear Heart Program, I discussed the 90/10 and 10/90 equation relationship between the heart and the brain. An optimal energy equation is 90% heart/ 10% brain. As I described in the webinar, this equation correlates to our physiology where 90% of the signals through our vagus nerve travel UP from the heart to the brain and only 10% of the signals go DOWN from brain to heart.
Out of stress and over-busy-ness, most of us are operating energetically in the inverse 0r 10% heart and 90% brain.
When we learn how to correct this imbalance, we can easily choose to slow-down our pace and our breathing. We then end up being more present and flowing and capable of amping-up life’s pleasures in all things! And we easily let go of old feelings from the past that related to unworthiness and the drive to perfectionism.
For example, writing this article could be stressful and feel like “work I HAVE to do”. But I am experiencing it as a flowing, easy energy grounded in appreciation and enjoyment.
So in this way, I am not busy, I am present and enjoying what I am doing this very moment. Likewise, with my work with clients, I am not busy when I am present in a session. I am focused on being present and I am appreciating the privilege of connecting with another person’s heart, hopes, challenges and dreams.
To schedule a Clear Heart Session with me or to view the rebroadcast of The Clear Heart Program, contact me at ronna@modernmastery.com
When our Work and our Worth get Entangled… Part 2 of Creating from the Clear Heart Series.
If you’d like to learn more about the process of Creating from the Clear Heart, please email me for the code and PIN for my free webinar replay! ronna@modernmastery.com
I get about 5 to 6 emails a day from experts on some topic related to “how to change my life”. This is a result of placing a high value on growth and consciousness, spirituality and the pursuit of excellence in my personal and professional life. Because of this, I’ve signed up for lots of newsletters, telesummits and workshops over the years. Many of the emails are focused on what others think may be wrong with me and “how to fix it”! About one week into the New Year, I received this presumptuous email from a “guru” that really turned me off.
Here’s what it said: From a self-help leader: “Hi Ronna! You seem to be a little bit confused about exactly what your mission is here on planet Earth. I would like to offer a bit of help.” Wow! I didn’t think I was confused… not even a “little bit”! I know exactly why I am here and I believe that everyone knows this in their hearts. In fact, my youngest child asked me when he was 5 years old, “Mom, Why I am here?” He really meant it in the BIG way, and not related to why we were in a particular room in the house. I told him: “Why don’t you sit down and get quiet, and ask yourself this question.” He did. After about 15 seconds, he jumped up and said: “I am here to help parents and kids love each other.” As the saying goes…. From the mouths of babes oft comes great wisdom.
This leads me to Part 2 of the article I posted on 1-31-2015. My previous blog is entitled: “When Love and Control Get Confused”. The same process that I described in that article is present if someone is struggling with life purpose. Underneath this struggle, invariably is an entanglement with work and worth. When our Work and our Worth get confused or entangled, we can be assured that we are not creating from a clear heart. Instead, we are going about our work from an underlying place of fear. Or to say it another way, we are creating from a place of the head and a list of “should’s”… such as, “I should stay at the job that I dislike because I might not get a better one… I should be responsible… I should do what’s expected of me… I should play it safe and stay with the known.”
Another factor that is often “at work” in this issue is creating from a common misconception: believing that the work we do in the world, determines our worth. In the webinar on February 12th, I will share with you how I untangled from this common fallacy in 2014…. It was a challenging process, like many of life’s most important lessons. The backdrop of this lesson was that someone I trusted attempted to take everything, and I mean every “thing” that I had worked to create in my adult life. I will share what happened in 2014 during the call. And because of the sensitive nature of what I will share with you, I may not rebroadcast the webinar, so if you are interested, be sure to tune in! (see details below.)
Back to my son’s wisdom at age 5: I believe that we each have this clarity and that we don’t need someone else to help us remember what we have forgotten (if we have!) As adults, the process of remembering our purpose can be a bit more involved than it is for children who are free of mental clutter, responsibilities and obligations. But the process of tapping into profound insight is the same. But before we can “Change” or do something differently, I believe that we owe it to ourselves to STOP trying to change and first accept where we are now. However, acceptance alone is not the key ingredient. The key ingredient is understanding the purpose that is served by being exactly where we are – whether it’s financial, health, relationship, career, social connections, or just basic dissatisfaction with our lives in general.
Growth not change
I believe that life is all about growth. However, growth does not always lead to change. Some growth creates the wisdom to stay where we are and how we are because we see the value in what we have created. The key word here is wisdom.
In my experience, only when I quit trying to change, was lasting change really possible. In essence, I grew rather than changed. There is a big difference between these two things.
One of the first steps in my life-transition coaching, is to guide clients through a “deep dive” process into the 360 degree review I created and outlined in my film, Sacred Journey of the Heart. I came up with this process to help clients observe the clues all around them which always reflect the deeper meaning about why things are the way they are. When we take the time to actually do this, vs stop trying to change the way things are, awareness and insight bursts through and from here, lasting change is possible.
The same 3 factors I described in my previous article are at work in untangling our work from our worth. http://sacredjourneyoftheheart.com/blog/?p=236
So what impels us to grow? I’ve heard the concept of “divine discontent”. This is the idea that it is our discontent that drives us to align with a deeper heart-space and a higher spiritual purpose. According to this idea, our shortcomings lead us to change. And the desire to change is driven by unhappiness, dissatisfaction and disconnect from something essential.
In my years of coaching and counseling, I’ve discovered that trying to change from a foundation of discontent, leads to more of the same. Why? Because we are trying to create something new, from a basis of the old. It would be like trying to plant a garden in a fallow patch of earth.
My suggestion is to allow yourself to be motivated to grow by accepting and understanding where you are now. If you feel out of sync with your work, you may want to explore my Clear Heart process.
Here are some signs of an entanglement with work and worth:
- Conflicts with people at work that are distracting and disruptive
- Getting annoyed with your boss and co-workers
- Feeling exhausted at the end of the day
- Believing that you are not in the right line of work
- Trying to convince yourself that you are working at a certain job because you have to
- Believing that your work reflects upon your worthiness
The question again is: Why do we do this and accept these conditions? The answer is the same as in my previous article. Many of us grew up believing that work and worthiness are inextricably woven together. And if we believe this on any level, we then think that we need to change our work in order to change our lives.
I presented a free webinar on The Clear Heart Program on 2-12. The replay of the event is available by request: ronna@modernmastery.com
Happy Heart Month!
Ronna
Untangling the energy of love from the fear of control
(webinar info below- February 11, 2015 at 6 pm Mountain)
by Ronna Prince, HeartMath & Radical Forgiveness Coach, Brain Tek Practitioner and Filmmaker, Sacred Journey of the HeartHave you ever found yourself in a tense situation with a loved one, family or friend that was frustrating or annoying? Did you feel like whatever you said was misinterpreted, ignored or rebuffed? Or has a loved one suggested something to you that set you on edge, leaving you feeling criticized or attacked.
This happened to me a while ago, when my loved one suggested I do something different to improve my sleep patterns. It was a simple suggestion but I found myself feeling annoyed, criticized and rejected. I even had a few imaginary conversations with him to practice what I was going to say -you know, “give him a piece of my mind!” Then Whoa! I had an aha moment… I realized that he was suggesting this to me because he loves me, not because he was trying to control me. (Any by the way, when you want to give someone a “piece of your mind”, it is invariably connected to shutting off a chunk of your heart!)
The reality is that a person who loves us is always “involved” with us on many levels…. and being invOLVEd contains the letters “IN LOVE”! So how did I confuse his loving involvement with control? And even more importantly, how could I EVOLve my consciousness of this issue without LOVE? Well, the answer is, I couldn’t. It was time to make a different, clear-hearted choice.
Choose an open heart
A KEY to making the choice to give and receive from a clear heart is learning to untangle the emotion and expression love from a deeply seated fear of being controlled by a loved one. The truth is that love and fear cannot reside in the same space- so in my view, this is the most important relationship issue to heal.
No fear- only love
Here are some signs of an entanglement with love and fear of control:
- Petty arguments that repeat over and over and are not resolved with love
- Getting annoyed when you are asked to do something small for a loved one (such as “Will you please pick up my dry cleaning on the way home?” or “Would you mind mailing this letter for me?”)
- Putting off or avoiding physical intimacy, including no longer holding hands or giving neck and back rubs or neglecting to just touching your loved one in passing
- Not listening with your full attention when your loved one is talking to you
- Feeling resentment when your loved one makes suggestions about something you could do differently or better
- Saying nasty little things in your head about your loved one
- Faking your actions or reactions in any way at all.
The question is: Why do we do this? Just looking at the list, it seems obvious that these are relationship busters and petty behaviors that we should have grown out of when we grew up!
Image from Sacred Journey of the Heart film
But the problem is, many of us never really grew up understanding that love does not mean control! We experienced a lot of things our parents did to us or for us, as controlling us. For the most part, this is a healthy part of growing up with parents who had reasonable rules and good personal boundaries. But if there were some unhealthy connections between love and control, we most likely have carried these into our significant relationships. Over time, our behaviors will crop up in insidious ways to undermine the foundation of our primary love relationships as adults.
So what is the solution? It is learning to untangle the reality of love from a fear of being controlled by a loved one.
Here are a few suggestions to begin the process of “untanglement” – this leads to what I call “A Clear Heart”. Because if your heart is cluttered with fear of being controlled by someone who is simply trying to love you, you are pushing away the very thing that can heal you. (And by the way, I love the topic of quantum entanglement in relationship! The idea is that at all times, we are with exactly the right person to mirror a greater whole that consists of two parts coming together in a “spooky dance”!)
Clear hearts- more light
I have defined 3 categories that are all involved in the process of letting go of entanglement and 4 ways to change the resulting patterns:
Cognitive: these are a series of questions to ask yourself from a Clear Heart space. I will share some examples below. This “Clear Heart” practice involves using your thoughts and emotions, largely based on things that you already know. This process can begin the journey of relationship healing.. but it only gets you so far because most of the entanglement occurs at a subconscious, unconscious AND physiological levels. Emotional love-control entanglement is deeply rooted in learned behaviors and belief systems imposed on you before you were able to make your own decisions. So the next two categories are where the real transformation happens.
Spiritual: In order to untangle love and control issues at a deeper level, I believe that engaging in a spiritual practice is very important. If you realize that you have been impacted by unhealthy beliefs around love and control, spiritual practices such as meditation and prayer are essential to evolve beyond the little self or the ego. I also practice the 5 steps of Radical Forgiveness and live a RF-based lifestyle. Radical Forgiveness is a powerful system developed by Colin Tipping that “busts” your victim stories and provides you with a step-by-step process of empowerment. (see link below for a recorded webinar during which I discuss how RF works.)
Physiological: I use two more powerful modalities that address the two places that our emotions and thoughts about things get entangled: our heart and our brain. Without learning how to consciously manage these two important organs, we get limited results with cognitive and spiritual practices. These two modalities are HeartMath tools and techniques and Brain Tek’s Behavioral Relationship Entrainment Program. (Both of these are discussed in detail in earlier blog posts.) The good news is that both of these practices are effective, easy and convenient to learn and to use on a regular basis in the privacy of your own home. With the HeartMath practices, you learn how to harness the physiological power of your heart to decrease stress, increase a genuine connection with yourself and others and develop creative heart-based solutions to any situation.
But for me, the real “missing link” has been in the physiological neural wiring in the brain. If your brain is wired through repetition and conditioning to interpret events as dangerous, controlling or fearful, no amount of cognitive processing, spiritual practice or heart coherence activity can over-ride a deep-brain based pattern. What Brain Tek’s program does, is to free up stuck neural patterns and create more effective neural connections so that you CAN consistently and effectively put all the other techniques in to practice.
If you are interested in learning about exactly how this works and hearing about the real results I have experienced with myself and my clients, watch this webinar presentation I offered last month.
Breaking Free Webinar: Radical Forgiveness, HeartMath and Brain Tek
I am offering a 20% discount on the 6 week BRE program for the first 3 people who sign up for the program. It is easy, effective, lasting and life-changing! Contact me at: ronna@modernmastery.com
The Clear Heart Practice: Questions to Untangle love from fear
Before entering into the clear heart practice, I do a short meditation and an innovative heart-connection that I’ve developed over the years. I will be sharing this specific technique in a free webinar in February (See below for details).
Sample questions in the Clear Heart Practice:
- Am I open to receiving love or am I blocking love out of fear?
- Is my loved one really trying to control me or is he/she simply loving me and trying to help?
- What am I afraid will happen if I do what is being asked of me?
- Do I need to be right more than I desire to be loved? – a popularized phrase but very powerful in the context of the Clear Heart practice.
- What is stopping me from reaching out to my loved one?
- Am I willing to let go of fear of rejection and put this into application?
- Am I willing to own my projections and love the part of myself that is afraid of not being worthy of love? (a Key Radical Forgiveness principal).
These questions are just one way to begin to untangle old patterns and open to love from the clear heart. Join me in learning more about the integration of these practices!
Title: Creating from a Clear Heart
Date & Time: Wednesday, February 11th at 6:00pm Mountain
Attend by Phone: (audio only)
Guest pin code: 339751#
Primary dial in number: (425) 440-5100
Secondary dial in number: (619) 471-1669
Full list of dial in Numbers:
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/Local/?eventid=65380800
Event Page: (Audio with Power Point slides!)
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=65380800
Happy Heart Month!
Interested in learning more on this topic? Join my 1 hour webinar – info below.
How often have you heard someone tell you, when contemplating what to do about an issue, to “just let it go”? Or have you found yourself saying, “I just have to let this go..” and then realizing later that the issue, person or thing is still there, lurking around the corner? Or even more obvious, you find yourself facing another situation just like the one you gotten out of! I’ve seen this with my clients and experienced it myself, in relationships, work related projects, issues of health like the recurring 10 pound weight loss and gain. This pattern reminds me of the French saying, “the more things change, the more they stay the same.”
After spending some time immersed in the pattern of “letting go” and having it crop up again, I finally got to the core of this issue that underpins a lot of repeating experience. And I call that getting to the core of the 5 W’s of Letting Go and Holding Dear. And these are not the journalistic – who, what, when, where and why questions! Those are just facts that fall into place after the foundational “W”s are solidified.
The Foundational 5 “W”s in the Art of Letting Go and the Act of Holding Dear
Wisdom
Worthiness
Wholeness
Wealth
Well-Being
I am going to delve into each one of these during my webinar on 1-21, 2015 during which I will share with you the specifics of how to work with these 5 energies or states of being.
But before we get to that next week, I have listed below the 5 surefire ways of having something we want to let go of, happen again (i.e. what not to do) and 5 reliable ways to ensure that we expand upon the things that we hold dear to our hearts. It looks like a simple list, but it’s an empowering starting process to become more clear and conscious about what we are creating in 2015.
| How to ineffectively let go – i.e. bring it on again! | How to truly let it go – a new beginning: |
| Letting go without learning the lesson | What have I learned? How did I grow from this situation? |
| Letting go without realizing the gift | What is the gift In what happened? What happened for me, vs “to me”. |
| Letting go with blame, regret or shame | How did I contribute to this situation? Have I truly forgiven those involved? |
| Letting go with conditions | Am I holding onto conditions such as “I will let go only if I’m sure it won’t happen again.” |
| Letting go with the spiritual bypass (or cop-out) of “it’s all good” | Have I allowed myself to feel my true feelings around the situation – or have I stuffed and denied how I feel? |
About mid-way through 2014, I started using this new technique and tool for myself… and in doing so, I shifted out of some old patterns that continued to clear and in late December 2014, completely ended. I have never been so excited about a New Year as I am in January 2015!
I invite you to join me to create from a new platform in 2015!
Title: The Art of Letting Go
Time: Wednesday, January 21st at 5:00pm Mountain
Listening method: Phone + Web Simulcast
To attend, visit:
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=64448400
Phone Number: (425) 440-5100
Pin Code: 339751#